Anna Nicole Would Have Needed to Be High

Crass? Just wait till you hear what I say before JUDGING ME! I don’t want to live by YOUR RULES MAN!

You know, I would have most likely avoided seeing any of the Anna Nicole Smith burial trials on tv had it not been for MSNBC and Tivo seeing to it that I’d be exposed unintentionally.

Last week, I think it was late Thusrday night when I intended to watch Hardball with Chris Matthews, I was instead presented with the TV coverage of the Anna Nicole Smith trial. It appeared to be live and I guess they preempted Hardball.

I kept watching as I thought for sure they’d return to the program but it kept on going.

There was Howard K Stern on a shaky camera while questions were thrown at him and some advice and odd comments flew through the air. Apparently that was the judge talking like he had shit in his mouth.

Shot for brains too, as the discussions and interrogations on Mr. Stern were as disorganized as I could ever imagine.

Various numbnuts lawyers got up and tried to entrap him on all manner of topics and I must say I was enthralled for about 20 minutes.

But it saddened me to think our court systems were actually like this. That judges such as the meally mouthed chicken legged critter up there telling his home spun logical meanderings had a position of authority. And that the lawyers who were so ill prepared jumpbled and fumbled their words to get in questions that did not even belong in a hearing about where Anna Nicole Smith would be buried. (read more…)

Anna Nicole Smith’s Death? Trim Spa Baby

Anna Nicole Smith’s Death? Trim Spa Baby by Roxanne McDonald

Now before you get all excited about slander and lawsuits and whatnot, know that I am only speculating and therefore am exercising that which we still consider free speech rights.

But, man, here was this gorgeous woman (well, gorgeous when she was made up), the decade’s Marilyn Monroe (whom Nicole always idolized), who gained weight (over personal traumas and such). Then, seemingly all of a sudden, this buxom and voluptuous babe is a bone with boobs. So what, right? Lot’s of stars are that thin. However…

From the very first appearances (on talk shows, in the TS commercials, on MTV Awards nights), she was showing some speedy behavior: bruxism (teeth gnashing) and tardive dyskinesia (jawing, looking like she was chewing but wasn’t, odd eye movements, tongue out of control). Her eyes were without focus, and her bodily movements and facial gestures were heavily affected (on top of how she did those grand poses, that is).

I considered the dangers of a rapid weight loss pill to be the primary causes. Of course, from what has been reported, Anna Nicole also drank heavily and in binge style, and did other recreational drugs—so the contraindications may have been the thing that caused her death. Maybe a heart attack, from the combined stress and strain of losing her son within days of his returning to her side (for her new baby’s birth) and the legal dealings (over first hubby’s money) did it.

Or maybe, as is the latest rumor—again, all, including the above, unsubstantiated—Howard K. Sterns helped along her demise.

Forensics will have to educate us, regardless of what we guess right now.

Say hello to Marilyn, Anna Nicole.